Husband and I recently went to Wet 'n' Wild without our children. It was intended for us to finally go on some big rides together, as our 3-year-old doesn't yet meet the minimum height requirements, and I always happily volunteer myself to stay in the little-kids section with him, where I'm comfortable and safe because the water level barely goes past my knees.
We hadn't been on a ride or water slide together since we were in America 10 months ago. And before that, it had been years since I'd been on a ride full stop!
But on our way to the stairs, I began feeling concerned with the fact that we were about to go on a ride head first. Perhaps I'm a traditionalist - I believe in going down slippery dips the regular, comfortable, safe way. Not on my feet, not on my stomach, not on a scooter, and certainly not head first! Maybe I've just gotten boring in my old age.
For a bit of perspective, this is what the 360 Rush looks like:
We arrived at the top and it was our turn. With my heart beating fast, I was about to chicken out, but instead forced Husband at the last possible second to switch slides with me because I was scared by the look of the pink one. He agreed, the light turned green, and we both made it to the end of the ride unharmed. It was then declared that next was the 360 Rush.
I was hesitant. I was anxious. I was uncomfortable. Or at least that's the way I saw it. Apparently Husband bribed me with chocolate, but still had to drag me to the line.
In this state of hesitation, I was reminded that while Husband and I were in America last year, I plunged 120 feet down the Summit Plummet, and lived to tell the tale. It took me 20 minutes once I was at the top, and I almost vomited a few times, but still, I (eventually) conquered that ride. He reminded me how proud he was that I did something crazy like that!
I'd obviously quickly forgotten this great accomplishment when faced with the pressure of tackling this next fear. It wasn't as tall, but, it was a completely different experience, and certainly (to me) just as scary!
I climbed in. The sounds of rushing water encompassed me. I grabbed tightly to the side of the slide, refusing to let go, even though I knew I had to. It was like my brain and my body disconnected for what seemed like endless minutes. Strangers were worried about me. I didn't think I could do it. I tried to remember the Summit Plummet, but all I could remember was the exact thing happening right before I went on the ride. I was just too scared to complete the mission and make Husband proud.
Maybe I just wasn't ready yet... "One more person" I declared to Husband, who was strapped into the slide next to me, and ready to go! He was going to go without me! "I'll meet you at the bottom" he says. "One more person! And then I'll go!". He grudgingly got out to wait with me. I think it was the waiting that terrified me the most. Waiting, ever so still on that clear piece of plastic. Waiting for the sound of the trap-door. Waiting to free fall into the tube of terror.